But now, it’s come to our attention that our very own Red Bank, Monmouth County, New Jersey, isn’t alone among its name-sharers to struggle with a reputation as “Dead Bank.”

Turns out the City of Red Bank, Tennessee, a “small community surrounded by Chattanooga” whose population total of 12,000 mirrors our own, also gets the business for not having enough business.

Here’s a letter to the editor of the Chattanoogan that was posted Monday:

Councilman Bill Wallace’s Dead Bank Insult Was Unfair
posted July 11, 2011

Dear Councilman Wallace,
I am a proud resident of Red Bank of 47 years. My hometown is in transition like other communities. The empty store fronts and empty buildings not just in Red Bank. The economy is hurting everyone. I work in Hixson and count just as many empty stores in Hixson.

I am tired of the bad reputation that everyone has given to Red Bank. It started when the traffic cameras were put in place. Again, this is not just in Red Bank. These cameras are popping up all over our fair city of Chattanooga. The only traffic cameras that are in question are in Red Bank. If people would slow down and drive right, they would not know that they are there.

Red Bank is on the edge of a bright future. The Red Bank Middle School is getting a new home. The old high school is going to be torn down to make way for new businesses. The new Bi-Lo center has done quite well. The new improvements to the former Red Bank Hardware building and Athletic Shop has made our fair community brighter.

I have great faith in the Red Bank Commissioners to get our community back on the road. Mayor Millard and his group will get the job done. I am excited to see the improvements going on in my hometown.

It was not fair of you to tell Signal Mountain that they will be the next “Dead Bank.” The communities of Red Bank and Signal Mountain are two different areas. Each town has it’s own specialties and beauties. Making fun of Red Bank is classless and wrong.

Councilman Wallace, I’ll think about you at my next meal at Red Bank’s Taco Bell.

Very proud Red Bank resident,
Laura Crane
ToBSketching@aol.com

From News Channel 9, WTVC, in Chattanooga:

A problem is brewing for homeowners in Red Bank who say they’ve seen a number of coyotes near their homes.

Vice Mayor Joe Glasscock says the city has three trappers lined up to help rid the area of wild coyotes.
Glasscock says they’ve found four dens, with dozens of coyotes inside.

As for whether the wild animals will harm humans, Matt Majors with the Tennessee Wildlife Resource Agency says it’s unlikely. “Anything can happen in the wild, but I’d say it’s highly unlikely for one to attack a human just due to the fact that their food habits are small mammals and rodents,” Majors told NewsChannel 9.

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DUI lawyer Johnny Houston, who outpolled incumbent Judge Gary Disheroon in voting Thursday, dropped us an e-mail over the weekend.

Well John [redbankgreenman, that is], I feel pretty good about the result, given that I won. Believe it or not, this is only the second instance in modern times that ANY incumbent judge in this county has been turned out of office. I guess my momma loves me more than his does.

I thought it would feel different to be judge. When I woke up this morning, I expected my family to greet me with, “Good morning, your honor.” I was disappointed. My 15 year-old then informed me that the only way that he would call me “your honor” is if he is a defendant in my court. I then told him that would handle all family transgressions while wearing my judicial robe. He was unimpressed.

Actually, I worked quite hard to win the race. I must have eaten at our local “home cookin” (i.e. breaded and deep-fried) restaurants 50 times over the last three weeks. I went to “Lillie Mae’s” and had fried catfish today out of sheer habit. Only when I was finished did I recall that the election was over.

Thanks for the interest. If y’all are ever this way, give us a shout.

John

Is it any wonder this guy’s momma loves him?

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The Daily Chattanoogan reports that Houston beat Disheroon by a vote of 845 to 695.

As previously reported here at redbankgreen, Houston, a lawyer specializing in DUI cases, had the key endorsements of his mother and wife. Disheroon rallied late in the campaign with public expressions of support from his own sister, parents, and a hunting buddy. But Houston may have pulled away at the end with a just-folks e-mail to redbankgreen that Disheroon did not counter.

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Our long-distance coverage of the dueling love notes written by kin of both candidates in the race for city judge in Red Bank, Tenn., has not gone unnoticed down in the Volunteer State.

The challenger, Johnny Houston, e-mailed us (click image above to enlarge) last night to explain the role of the fawning missives, which have appeared in recent days in the opinion pages of the Daily Chattanoogan. Houston’s mother and wife have shamlessly weighed in, as have the sister and parents of the incumbent, Judge Gary Disheroon, to tell voters why their boys deserve the judgeship.

“We appreciate your interest in our election skirmish down here,” Houston writes. “Unlike other areas of the country, people down south want to make sure a candidate’s family likes them before wasting a vote. I once heard a voter say (in reference to ANOTHER candidate), ‘If his momma and daddy don’t like him, then why should I?’ “

He adds:

These letters from our respective relatives are nothing more than proof to the voters that we are at least favored in our own families. After all, we are both attorneys.

Well, we’ve got to hand it to Houston. Like the relatives of each candidate, he says not a disparaging word about the other side. Instead, he’s simply charming, with that casual use of “momma and daddy” and the self-deprecating lawyer bit that applies to both Disheroon and himself.

And in terms of strategy, Houston’s e-mail to redbankgreen is brilliant. With the election tomorrow night, Disheroon, who’s been playing catch-up for a week in the letters department, barely has time to match Houston him with his own e-mail to us. This could be decisive.

We’ll follow this race right to the end. If nothing else, it should be good practice for our coverage of the charm-off expected this fall between mayoral candidates Pasquale Menna and John Curley, right here in Red Bank, N.J.

By the way: Immediate relatives of Curley and Menna are welcome—no, make that strongly encouraged—to write us here at redbankgreen. Don’t be shy; this is democracy at work!

If this were another Monmouth County publication, one we won’t identify by name, we’d be screeching in this space about how influential we were on politics from here to Tennessee.

That’s not us. We’re redbankgreen, the alternative to the alternative newspaper out of Asbury Park. And so we’ll acknowledge that it’s a pure coincidence that, one day after our last post on the race for city judge in Red Bank, Tenn., three relatives of the incumbent, Gary Disheroon, had a letter to the editor published in the Daily Chattanoogan in which they polish their guy’s apple.

If you missed it, we chided Disheroon on Saturday for letting a very public hugfest by the mother and wife of his opponent, Johnny Houston, go unanswered. Well, now the voters out in Red Bank, Tenn. are being served.

Under the headline “Proud of Gary Disheroon’s Campaign Conduct,” the latest missive appeared Sunday, over the names of Gwen, Jimmie and Preston Disheroon. They identify themselves as the judge’s sister and parents. “He is a loyal and supportive husband, step-father, brother and son,” they write.

In fact, the Disheroon camp seems to be stepping up its game. The family letter is accompanied by one from “a personal friend, a hunting partner, and a lawyer who has tried cases before his court” that also praises the candidate.

We saw something like this in the last gubernatorial race here, didn’t we? Except that, this being New Jersey, the most prominent relative to speak out was now-Gov. Jon Corzine’s ex-wife, and she did anything but try to buff his image.

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Well, now the candidate’s wife has written in to sing his praises. And the Daily Chattanoogan has once again not stood in the way of what is clearly a burgeoning charm offensive. The paper ran Mrs. Laura Houston’s letter yesterday. Headline: “Johnny Houston Does What Is Right And Fair.”

This made redbankgreen wonder how many letters of praise the Chattanoogan has run from relatives of Houston’s opponent in the race, incumbent Gary Disheroon. The answer, going by a search of the newspaper’s online archive: none.

What on earth is wrong with this guy? It’s like watching John Kerry stand by while he got Swift-boated all over again. Only in this case, Disheroon is remaining quiet amid a public lovefest for Houston; neither Houston’s Mom, Nancy Estes, nor his wife says an unkind word about Disheroon. In print, that is.

It’s a wholly civilized affair. And yet, somehow, it cries out for retaliation. Can’t Disheroon scrounge up one relative to write him a gushing endorsement? Don’t the people of Red Bank, Tenn., deserve to know what his kin think of him?

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It seems they do things a little differently in Red Bank, Tenn., a suburb of Chattanooga. For instance, they elect their judges. For another, the local newspaper is apparently glad to yield a portion of its opinion page to a candidate’s mother so she can tell readers what makes her son the best choice for a judgeship.

Today’s Chattanoogan has a letter to the editor from the mother of Johnny Houston, a candidate for Red Bank City Judge. Houston’s mom, Nancy Estes, wants voters to know some of Johnny’s wonderful qualities. These are numerous, so the letter runs to 550 words. Johnny’s mom promises voters they will not regret voting for him.

Shameless, yes, but the letter is charming and actually rather persuasive. Makes us want to pull a lever for Johnny. Then again, have we heard from the other candidate’s mom yet?