Skip to content

A town square for an unsquare town

redbankgreen

Standing for the vitality of Red Bank, its community, and the fun we have together.

KEVIN SMITH, MARINE PARK POTTYMOUTH

Ksmith8

Coming off a 13-hour marathon that had him signing geek memorabilia almost until dawn at his Broad Street comic book store, filmmaker Kevin Smith entertained 2,000 fans in Marine Park last night with a mixture of endless approachability and profanity.

Local politicians, including Mayor Ed McKenna and mayoral candidate Pat Menna, all but kissed Smith at the start of his open-air Q&A and rocked with laughter at his early answers. But they grew increasingly rigid of jowl and then vanished from stage right as the director of the recently-released ‘Clerks II’ worked his way through an hour of audience questions with dozens if not hundreds of graphic references to sex.

Until a host finally interceded, many of the questions came from self-described aspiring filmmakers asking for jobs, advice or an opportunity to have picture taken with Smith. Increasingly, such requests elicited groans from the audience.

But as he had at Jay & Silent Bob’s Secret Stash on Monday, when he stayed past 4a to greet every fan who turned out seeking an autograph, Smith indulged most questions and requests, no matter how inspired or insipid. Twice he spoke by cell phone to friends of audience members, and agreed to sign one man’s penis after the event.

And consistent with the studied edginess of his films, nearly all of Smith’s answers contained a word or bit of carnal imagery not likely to appear anytime soon in a Borough Council resolution, let alone the Asbury Park Press, The Hub or the Two River Times.

To wit:

‘When did I fuck Superman?’

‘Sportfuck.’

‘Suck me off.’

‘Suck off a guy.’

‘You love Wolverine? That means you love cock.’

‘Is your dick really small, like mine?’

‘I’m 36 and I still wear a shirt in the fucking swimming pool.’

‘That’ll make a dude lose his hard-on fast, if he sees my name over his lady’s ass crack.’

‘There were a lot of butt-fucking jokes in that movie. Did you understand them?’ (This one was in response to a girl who said she’d seen the 1999 film ‘Dogma’ when she was 5 years old.)

‘I like my wife. I like fucking my wife. I want to continue fucking my wife.’

Smith’s sundown appearance preceded a screening of his 1994 indie hit, ‘Clerks,’ which he described as a $28,000 film in which “people just basically sit around and say ‘fuck’ a lot.”

When a fan remarked on Smith’s cinematic skills, as evidenced by his ability to draw such a large crowd, Smith objected.

“That doesn’t say a lot about the quality of my movies,” he said. “It says a lot of people got nothing better to do on a Tuesday night.”

E-mail this story

Remember: Nothing makes a Red Bank friend happier than to hear "I saw you on Red Bank Green!"
Partyline
VOLUNTEERS GET INTO THE WEEDS
Toting plastic trash bags, 51 volunteers conducted a walking litter cleanup on Red Bank's West Side Saturday.
“IT’S A PARTY AT WAWA!”
You wish you could vibe like Brian, who lives on the other side of Hubbard’s Bridge. He caught redbankgreen’s attention in Red B ...
POPE OKS ORATORY
RED BANK: St. Anthony of Padua obtains papal approval to establish Oratory of St. Philip Neri, a community of priests and brothers devoted t ...
RED BANK: NEW MURAL BRIGHTENS CORNER
RED BANK: Lunch Break founder Norma Todd is depicted in a mural painted this week on the front of the newly renovated social service agency.
TULIPS TOGETHER
Spring tulips taking in the sunset outside the Molly Pitcher Inn in Red Bank Monday evening.
RIVER RANGERS RETURN
River Rangers, a summer canoeing program offered by the Navesink Maritime Heritage Association, returns this summer for up to 20 participa ...
DOUBLE DYLAN IN RED BANK
Trucks for a production company filming what one worker said was a Bob Dylan biography have lined Monmouth Street the past two days with cre ...
AFTER THE RAIN
A pear tree branch brought down by a brief overnight storm left a lovely tableau on the sidewalk in front of Red Bank's Riverside Gardens Pa ...
CONE OF UNCERTAINTY
Asked by a redbankgreen reporter why these cones were on top of cars, the owner of the car in the foreground responded: “That’s ...
RAIL RIDER’S VIEW
A commuter's view of Cooper's Bridge and the Navesink River from North Jersey Coast Line train 3320 out of Red Bank Tuesday morning.
PUT ME IN COACH!
Red Bank T-Ball kicked off at East Side park on Saturday morning. The brisk weather proved to be no deterrent to the young players, ranging ...
IT’S A SIGN!
Once proudly declaring its all-but-certain arrival in Spring 2019, the project previously known as Azalea Gardens springs to life again with ...
SPRINGTIME MEMORIES OF CARL
The Easter Bunny getup and St. Patrick’s Day hat that belonged to longtime Red Bank crossing guard and neighborhood smile-creator Carl ...
RED TRUCKS AT RED ROCK
A small dishwasher fire at Red Rock Tap and Grill was put out quickly by firefighters overnight, causing minimal damage. Red Bank Fire Depar ...
CREATIVE COVER UP
The windows of Pearl Street Consignment on Monmouth Street were smashed when a driver crashed their car through them injuring an employee la ...
THEY’RE BACK!
Ospreys returned to the skies over Red Bank this week for the first time since they migrated to warmer climes in late fall. With temperature ...
SPRING IS SPRUNG
RED BANK: Spring 2024 arrives on the Greater Red Bank Green with the vernal equinox at 11:06 p.m. Tuesday.
RED BANK’S FINEST – AND NEWEST
Red Bank Police Officer Eliot Ramos was sworn in as the force’s newest patrolman Thursday, and if you’re doing a double take thinkin ...
EASTER EGG MAYHEM AT THE PARK
An errant whistle spurred an unexpectedly early start to the Spring Egg Hunt on Sunday, which had been scheduled to begin at eggsactly 11am ...
PRESEASON DOCKWORK
RED BANK: With winter winding down, marina gets ready for boating season with some dockwork on our beautiful Navesink River.